How many times per year do you hear this token phrase, “The loser tonight has to pay for dinner tomorrow.” Whether it is a former teammate, a younger brother vs an older brother, neighbors vs former neighbors, Eskimo brother vs Eskimo brother or whatever other possible scenario you can dream up. You cannot tell me these multi millionaire athletes are only betting dinners and nothing more than that. As a guy that likes to bet the ponies myself, I cannot stand the bullshit any longer. I want to know the real bets and what is actually at stake for a game or match or whatever it may be.
It is as much a cliche as the classic lines like, “We have the utmost respect for them.” Or better yet, “He’s the first one in the building and the last one out.” I could go on and on about the classic sports cliches. Betting dinner with someone you have a relationship with, past or present, is on top of that list. It is the ultimate cop out for what really is going down. We all know the real truths are lines that would go like this, ” Yeah, we had ten grand on who would strike more guys out tonight.” Or things like, “I just lost to this asshole in a game of cribbage on the plane and now I have to wear a thong for a month straight.” Lastly, and probably the most distasteful line that I assume might happen, “If I don’t pass for at least 275 yards tonight, I have to watch (insert whatever opposing teams player relationships are being profiled that day/night) bang my girlfriend in front of me.” Okay, that last one might be a bit drastic, but how am I supposed to know? The lack of transparency in sports these days is downright disgraceful. Any normal human being knows there has to be crazy shit that goes on behind the scenes. We need to get that information. I guarantee the ratings would skyrocket! And let’s get serious, the only thing any of these asshole owners and commissionaires care about is what makes them money. The Ocho Cinco’s of the world do not exist anymore, and the game was better when we had them. They appealed to the common man. I want more of this kind of stuff: